Responding to “we can just be friends” can be tough. It’s really important that we do this thoughtfully and clearly. Honor the friendship and remember what drew you to them in the first place.
Whether that’s your parent, ex, sibling, or best friend, there is a unique opportunity here to create a real bond that isn’t dependent on dating. Once we accept this, we can become better friends and open ourselves up to greater emotional maturity.
You either can work to create a more positive rapport or remove yourself from the situation, if that’s what is better for your wellbeing. Whatever that looks like for you, prioritize your emotional health and be clear about your boundaries up front.
Whatever the answer, taking the time to cultivate that friendship is the best option. If you choose the alternate route, simply don’t forget to continue being respectful and real. Both are invaluable opportunities for learning and self-discovery.
Key Takeaways
- When someone tells you to go be “just friends,” they’re recommending a downgrade to a platonic relationship. This change creates space for deeper emotional connections, free from the demands of romance.
- Recognize that this advice may have stemmed from the other person’s desire for intimacy. Treat it like the big deal that it is to their individual circumstances.
- Consider how you feel about the friendship first so you can be honest with yourself and decide whether you’re okay with being friends.
- Be upfront, transparent, and honest about both of your feelings and what each of you is looking for to set clear expectations and avoid confusion.
- Being open about your feelings will help you both define the friendship and understand how to build each other up.
- Consider how awesome a non-sexual friendship would be. Plus, it can result in tremendous personal growth and unique bonding experiences, so consider these factors before making your decision.
Understanding the Suggestion
What Does It Mean
Just friends” can become a more honest way for two people to relate to each other. It’s about going from love to friendship, creating firm emotional lines.
Power dynamics come into play with the “friend zone” concept and cause a change in power dynamics. Both parties very much live in a constant state of re-negotiation. Emotional boundaries in this space are essential to prevent sending mixed signals.
This simple statement goes a long way to explain motives. In doing so, it helps to avoid limerence, an obsessive, infatuated state experienced by an estimated 10% of individuals. Understanding red flags such as overwhelming emotions and idealization will help you avoid the heartache that comes with a toxic connection.
Reasons for the Suggestion
Romantic attachment is often the reason for platonic relationships to form. Personal growth is the second important factor.
For some, previous negative experiences might make them more inclined to look for friendship rather than a romantic connection. For others, it’s the freedom to pursue common interests without the burden of dating.
Women especially would recommend friendship as a way to keep things non-sexual without coming off as rude from years of socialization to avoid conflict. Above all, clarity is key to preventing misinterpretation.
Being honest about wanting to be friends sets realistic expectations and avoids limerence. Ambiguous messaging can leave them with lingering uncertainty and emotional pain, complicating their ability to heal and move forward.
Establishing firm boundaries creates space for healthier friendships, allowing both people to have a fulfilling relationship without romantic hopes.
Responding to the Suggestion
1. Assess Your Feelings
First, let’s begin with the honest truth of how you feel about all this. Ask yourself questions like:
- Do I really want to be friends, or do I just want to date you?
- How have past relationships influenced how I feel now?
- Are there any fears about being just friends?
Identifying these feelings can help you figure out if a friendship could be developed without added drama.
2. Respect Their Decision
If they do decide to be platonic, then it’s important to honor that decision. Whatever their reasons, and regardless of how valid you may believe they are, respecting those boundaries establishes trust.
Show them that you are good with whatever direction they decide to go, and you’ll foster a much more beneficial give-and-take.
3. Communicate Openly
Nothing is more important than open communication. If you are forthright about your disappointment you can prevent hurt feelings and unintended disloyalty.
Instead, try asking open-ended questions, such as, “What do you want to get out of our relationship?
This opens them up to a more productive discussion and allows you to better understand their line of thinking.
4. Set Boundaries
Establishing boundaries ensures a healthy friendship. Consider these:
- Define which behaviors are acceptable.
- Set communication guidelines.
- Revisit these boundaries regularly.
This helps everyone feel comfortable and understood.
5. Decide on Friendship
Consider the costs and benefits of remaining friends. Consider how this is in line with your mission and equity aspirations.
Imagine the collective opportunities for real deep engagement with each other, our surroundings, and personal transformation.
Consider whether this connection is one to go after.
Crafting Short Messages for Friends
Regular happy little correspondences would go a long way to keeping those friendships alive and well. Here are a few examples:
- Hey! Remember when we cried from laughing so hard at that concert?
- Came across a little something that made me think of you. Made me happy to see that!
- “Your support means the world to me. Thank you!”
Using a conversational tone helps humanize the content. By sprinkling in jokes or common experience, relationships are enhanced. A little thing like sending a GIF from a shared favorite show, for instance, instantly makes her smile.
Keep them short, but friendly and approachable.
Express Gratitude
Thanking people has a huge impact. Focus on the things you admire about your friend. Read through it and use sincere language to convey how much you appreciate their support.
Let them know how their support is making a difference to your health and happiness. A well-timed compliment goes a long way in fostering gratitude. For an extra special touch, make your kind words into a personalized framed reminder.
Share Positive Memories
Remembering experiences you both had, together, brings forth those good feelings. List favorite moments that highlight your friendship, like:
- “Remember our road trip to the Grand Canyon?”
- That time we made dinner together and set the bread on fire.
- “Our endless talks at the coffee shop.”
These shared memories keep friends aware of your relationship and facilitate looking back, making your friendship feel richer and more meaningful.
Offer Support and Encouragement
Support your friend when they’re struggling. Avoid demoralizing terms, and help people see the bigger picture. When times get tough, remind them of their strengths and what’s worked before.
Make a tangible offer of support, such as being a sounding board. When friends can interpret your tears, their worth is beyond measure.
Creating Nice Messages to Friends
Creating beautiful notes to friends makes their lives a little more colorful, and strengthens your friendship in the process. Here are some ideas:
- Share a funny memory you both treasure.
- Remind them of their great acts of kindness and how they inspire or uplift the people around them.
- Congratulate them on recent milestones, big or small.
- Inspire them with a motivational quote that speaks to their personal journey.
Personal touches are what make your friends’ messages stand out. Highlight individual characteristics or common backgrounds that emphasize your gratitude. If they’ve just gotten you through a bad patch, show how their support got you through.
Nothing breaks the ice like humor and it deepens our relationships. A light-hearted pun or a quick inside joke can make someone smile and defuse tension.
Be sincere and genuine. Meaningful messages can enrich our relationships, elevate our spirits, and lift our ambitions. Research confirms what we all know—kind words improve performance, and like Mark Twain said, kind words stay with you forever.
Appreciate Their Qualities
Each person has something about them that is special. By recognizing these qualities you further strengthen their value and impact.
So for instance, if your friend’s superpower is empathy, focus on how their empathy makes your life better. Compliments such as these might serve as their secret weapon of motivation, the best form of social reward.
Celebrate Their Achievements
Acknowledging accomplishments boosts self-esteem. Commemorate birthdays and anniversaries with personal notes.
Schedule surprises or fun activities to celebrate their victories. Let them know you’re proud of their achievements and help them maintain their enthusiasm.
Inspire with Uplifting Words
We’re all looking for inspiration, and there’s no better way to share it than with motivational messages. These kind of words inspire and uplift, encouraging friends when they forget about their own greatness.
Support them in viewing obstacles as opportunities for growth, helping strengthen their belief that they can do amazing things.
Conclusion
Dealing with the “we can just be friends” reaction can be emotionally charged. It does serve to create new opportunities for development and engagement. Take this tip as an opportunity to deepen relationships or re-establish your ties. It’s really just about listening, being transparent with one another, and being sensitive to one another.
Being deliberate in our messaging goes a long way towards keeping things positive and friendly. These messages can convey your desire to learn and improve. As you work through these transitions, remember to prioritize authentic relationships and respect for one another. Keep in mind that each friendship is special in its own way.
Hungry to shift the energies or dynamics in your relationships? Approach these opportunities with a spirit of friendship and learning. Let’s continue the discussion and make those connections healthy and sturdy.
Frequently Asked Questions
What does “We can just be friends” mean?
It recommends a course of action that keeps things purely platonic, ensuring no unnecessary tension arises. Usually, it means that the person just wants to be friends, not lovers.
How should I respond to “We can just be friends”?
Recognize what they are feeling in this scenario. Show that you can be a good friend by being understanding and respectful of their decision while expressing your feelings in a positive friendship manner.
What are some short messages to send to a friend?
Maybe start with something as simple as a, “Hello, I hope you’re doing great!” or “Just wanted to say I appreciate you, buddy! This positive friendship can help avoid unnecessary tension and keep it upbeat.
How can I craft a nice message for a friend?
Just be yourself and be respectful in your flirty conversation. Here’s an example, “I appreciate you and our friendship, and I’m always here for you. It’s the personal touches—your story—that will make your messages stand out and avoid unnecessary tension.
Is it possible to remain friends after a romantic rejection?
Yes, it is indeed possible to maintain a positive friendship if there is respect and understanding on both sides. Consider giving each other space, if that’s what you need, and find common interests to connect as friends.
Why is it important to communicate openly when just being friends?
Being open with one another not only stops any miscommunication but also helps to establish a positive friendship, setting clear boundaries and expectations on both sides.
How can I maintain a healthy friendship after a romantic suggestion?
Be conscious of and respect boundaries, communicate openly, and focus on fun activities you can do together. With mutual understanding and some time, this positive friendship can grow much stronger.
